Jake English's Mysterious Theater of Scientific Romance from the Year 3000: 1 Year Anniversary Special

Edrobot: Well it's my one-year anniversary, but I'm also writing something for Camp NaNoWriMo... Maybe I should do something special for both of them. Hm...

Reviewing...

ATLANTA NIGHTS

Jake English's Mysterious Theater of Scientific Romance from the Year 3000 Episode 27

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Last time, on Jake Englishs' Mysterious Theater of Scientific Romance from the year 3000...

Phelous: Okay, it's time for me to review fanfiction because Jake English isn't here which automatically means I get to steal his show. So today we're going to read this copy of Fifty Shades of Gray that I found in an ancient Indian burial ground!

Obscuras Lupa: No, you fool! You'll destroy us allllllll!

Phelous: *Pfft* What's the worst that could happen.

*Cut to Darkdeath Evilman standing in the ruins of Phelous' house*

Darkdeath Evilman: Fools! Now that you have released me from my eternal slumber, I, Darkdeath Evilman, of Orgy XIII, shall bring ruin upon this pathetic planet!

Phelous: Hmm, maybe I shoudln't have drawn that pentagram before I started reading...

*Cut to Lux Lexor tied to a chair in an interrogation room*

Lux Lexor: Huh? What? Where am I?

Twilight Sparkle: Good evening, criminal. You have been forcefully drafted into Task Force X, better known as the Suicide Squad.

*Cut to Sho Minamimoto, The Great and Powerful Trixie, Gaz and Lux Lexor fighting covenant soldiers with machine guns*

Twilight (voiceover): Your mission; destroy Darkdeath Evilman before his armies breach the earth's core.

*Cut to Dr. Insano showing Sho a piece of paper*

Dr. Insano: Look carefully, the owls are not what they seem!

*Cut to an owl transforming into giant robot and then killing Phelous*

Phelous: OOOOOH MYYYY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD! *DEAD*

*Cut to Caius Ballad and Kotomine Kirei playing chess*

Caius: How long must we play this game, priest? Eventually, all things must come to an end...

Kotomine: Checkma†e.

Caius: ...Best two out of three?

*Cut to a shadowy throne room somewhere*

Jade Edwards: -|----- My lady, the Canadian one has took the bait. Darkdeath Evilman has been unleashed into realspace.

Prophet Gilesbie: kawaiicelent!!!! thos prepz wont' know what him them unthull its toolate. lol!

Jade Edwards: -|----- Yes... L-O-L indeed...

*Cut to Jade Edwards and Bladevash Dragonfang having a conversation somewhere in The Ways Between*

Bladevash Dragonfang: I still say we should jump her while we have the chance...

Jade E.: -|----- Paitence, Vash. Just string her a long a little longer, and soon the throne will be mine...

Bladevash Dragonfang: ...you mean "ours", right?

Jade E.: -|----- ...yes. That is exactly what I said.

Bladevash Dragonfang: But what of the boy who lived... through SBURB... who is not Jake English?

Jade E.: -|----- I would prepare yourself for battle at the earliest possible convenience. And be warned, he may look like a pushover, but he is more powerful than one might expect...

*Cut to Alfred Smith thrashing about in an amazon basin*

Alfred Smith: Oh my god I'm covered in leeches! Get em off me get em off me get em off me! STOP

And now, for the exciting conclusion.

Jake English's Mysterious Theater of Scientific Romance from the Year 3000 Episode 17

Episode 17

Sonichu, Issue #0

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Dave: so thats it? no witty diatribe or contrived setups today? we review sonichu or the universe explodes?

Future!Dave: pretty much. i mean i spent hours making that video look as shitty as possible not to mention finding a moron gullible enough to actually sing for me.

Dave: i can live with that. lets get this train wreck rollin already.

Jake English's Mysterious Theater of Scientific Romance from the Year 3000 Episode 16

Episode 16

Hart Shaped Love

"Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of dog, it's too dark to read."

- Socrates

Kotomine Kirei: So, Karka†, will you star† the fif†h Holy Grail War?

Karkat Vantas: NO. THE LAST THING WE NEED IS ANOTHER STUPID STORY ARC BASED ON A STUPID TV SHOW.

Edrobot: What?! Noooo, a Fate/Stay Night story arc would have been awesome! You were going to have Don Quioxtie as your Servant, and between fanfics you'd go around and make witty remarks about stuff!

Dave Strider: dont we do that anyway??

Edrobot: Well yes, but...

Jake English: Plus you're already stretching our audience's patience by making caius ballad our main villain. If they don't know who he is, they certainly wont know about kotomine.

Kotomine: He's got a poin†.

Edrobot: Okay fine... sorry about the false alarm, Kirei. If it's any consolation, I heard there's a Evangelion/Madoka Magica crossover down the hall that's looking for a third wheel, if you're interested.

Kotomine: †hanks, I'll look into that. Bu† jus† remember, if you ever need anyone murdered...

Edrobot: Uh, yeah. I'll keep you in mind. So long!

Kotomine: Farewell, Ed. And good luck on your project; I'm forward to seeing it crash and burn.

Dave: what a nice sociopathic murderer.

Karkat: SO BACK ON TRACK; NOW WHAT DO WE DO?

Jake: Well we've been pretty busy lately, so I think we deserve a break. Let's go back home for the Halloween Party!

Karkat: ...IT'S NOVEMBER.

Dave: we have a time machine. your argument is invalid.

Jake: Tallyho!